if ignorance was bliss, my silence would be golden #inyoface

Stress and My Life

Stress and My Life

            Stress is defined by most psychologists as a psychological and physiological response to a threating or challenging condition which requires some form of adjustment or adaptation. I would say that I have experienced stress on a daily basis according to this definition. I didn’t realize until I took this class and began to write the applied psychology papers how much being homosexual has affected my life. I’m constantly required to adjust or adapt in my daily life as a member of a minority group in a majority culture. I didn’t however know that it was a significant source of chronic stress. Unexpectedly, having to examine my life experiences through the lens of psychology; has as a result strengthened my identity as an LGBT individual.

            I have experienced many stressors which are defined as events or stimuli that produce emotional or physical stress. According to Holmes and Rahe (1967) and the Social Readjustment Rating Scale (SRRS) which measures stress by ranking different life events from most to least stressful by assigning a point value to each event I have experienced so far in my life jail term (63 points), personal injury or illness (53pts.), Change in financial state (38pts.), Death of a close friend (37pts.), taking out a loan for major purchase (31pts.), beginning or ending school (26pts.), change in living conditions(25pts.), and change in residence (20pts.). This makes my

life stress score 293. Many of these events didn’t come to mind until I had seen them on the list. At 293 I’m at the high end of medium susceptibility to stress-related illness. I should at this point learn and practice relaxation and stress management skills.

            Just this past December I and my Primary Care Physician worked together to slowly reduce and finally eliminate my taking of anti-depressants. I had been taking 10mg of Fluoxetine once daily. I took it upon myself to see a doctor and talk about my anxiety and depression last year when it became too much for me to bare and friends became concerned with my erratic behavior.

            It began when I moved into the Phoenix cooperative house and started living with 24 other individuals. I was the only LGBT male that lived within the house at the time and was feeling a great amount of stress from just trying to adapt or adjust to living with that large of a group of people. There also was the extra added stress of being a member of a minority group within a majority culture. One of the members named Ken in particular made me to feel unsafe in my own living environment by displaying aggression and intimidation due to the fact that he was homophobic. I myself sought help from the group as a whole; unaware of the horrible effects that “group think” can have on cooperative living. In addition to this I had just started to go back to school and was also beginning to deal with the situation where I had previously been physically and sexually been abused. I began taking the medication as prescribed and going to a LGBT support group for physical and sexual abuse survivors. Unfortunately, I received two anonymous text messages threating my life and that is when I decided to leave the house I had lived in and had worked so hard to make a home.

           

            I know now from group therapy and psychology class that Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) was the reason I was behaving so erratically. When I would be confronted and intimidated by Ken I would experience the symptoms of PTSD. I would have flashbacks, nightmares, and intrusive memories as if I was actually re-experiencing my physical and sexual abuse experience. I had increased anxiety, especially in the morning and I would startle more easily, and I experienced poor concentration when in school or trying to complete homework. When I decided to leave I experienced an approach-avoidance conflict in that I knew it was necessary for me to move out because it was no longer safe to continue living there and it was just as equally scary to move out and to live somewhere new but there was the possibility it may be an improvement. The price I paid for standing up for what I believed was ethical was 24 friendships.  

            I didn’t realize until now how much socioeconomic status dealt with stress. I myself came from a working-class family. The members in my immediate family all have blue-collar jobs. I am the only one to have ever gone on to pursue a post-secondary education. My parents are spending their retirement in a small mobile home in Alabama. Some of the links talked about between socioeconomic status and health are definitely present within my immediate family, such as the higher rates of smoking, limited social networks, and less regular patterns of eating.

            I myself know now that when I respond to stress I experience the fight-or-flight experience. When I would be confronted by ken or another member of the Phoenix cooperative house my body’s sympathetic nervous system would trigger a release of hormones in order to prepare my body to fight or escape the perceived threat. Since this would occur within my living

environment I in most cases responded because of these hormones with an aggressive fight response. I did in some cases go for a walk along picnic point but it was a last resort as I didn’t like being seen crying in public.

            This reaction is further demonstrated by the General Adaptation Syndrome by Hans Selye (1907-1982).  It consists of three stages the alarm stage, resistance stage, and the exhaustion stage. In the Alarm stage the brain sends a distress signal to the hypothalamus which stimulates the pituitary gland to pump out adrenaline. As a result the adrenal cortex releases glucocorticoid hormones that increase the heart rate, blood pressure and blood sugar levels resulting in the fight or flight response. The resistance stage is the next stage and where the adrenal cortex continues to release glucocorticoids to help the body resist stress. The last stage is exhaustion and it’s where all energy has been exhausted. I myself would experience this each time I would be confronted by Ken or another member of the house.

            According to Lazarus’s cognitive Theory of Stress when in a potentially stressful event individuals will engage in a cognitive process which involves a primary and secondary appraisal (1966; Lazarus & Folkman, 1984). The Primary appraisal concerns the meaning and significance of the situation and if the individual’s well-being will be affected positively, negatively, or not at all. In my situation I would think about the harm or damage that had already occurred, the potential for harm, damage, or loss, and the challenge of the opportunity to grow and gain something from the experience. When doing this you experience anxiety, fear, anger, and resentment. This is exactly what was going through my head at the time. The secondary appraisal

is if you deem the situation to be within your control you make a list of resources physical, social, and psychological. I myself was in pretty good physical health, however taking into account that when I left I would lose 24 friendships I didn’t deem my support network to be all that great and the situation definitely took its toll on my self-esteem. In the end however I decided in order to protect myself from further harm it would be best for me to leave. I did so using a coping strategy known as Problem-Focused Coping. It is where the result is a direct response aimed at reducing, modifying, or eliminating the source of stress once and for all.

            I don’t regret my responses or decisions. I believe whole heartedly that I did what I thought was ethical. I do think the price of 24 friendships and all the work I put forth to make the community I lived in a home a bit high though. It’s amazing the power “group think” can have over individuals with good intentions.

             

Let this be a lesson

Prejudice: An attitude (negative feeling) about a person or group based on stereotypes.

Discrimination: An action or behavior based on prejudice; differential unfair treatment.

Aspects of prejudice, discrimination & Racism
Types: Individual, Institutional, and Social/Cultural
Forms: Overt (obvious), Covert (undercover) and Micro Aggressions

I experienced all of these while living cooperatively in The Phoenix Cooperative http://www.madisoncommunity.coop/phoenix/ of Madison Community Cooperative (MCC) which is a member of North American Students of Cooperation (NASCO). http://www.nasco.coop/

I listed three separate instances in my previous blog post titled "Recent Events" that occurred with another older heterosexual white male member named Ken. I submitted those three instances as a document to the offices of MCC. They had a grievance meeting with Ken.

I know now from my education thus far in the Human Services program at Madison Area Technical College that there are theories of prejudice.

One theory of prejudice is the Authoritarian Personality: It involves a underlying insecurity & fear around difference. It is highly moralistic, nationalistic & authoritarian. There is a high need for order & structure and when people "don't fit" it is viewed as a problem. These are all traits that Ken exhibited.

The situation then resulted in the Frustration-Aggression-Displacement Hypothesis: Where needs are not met and with varying amounts of frustration which lead to hostility & aggression these are then displaced onto a "target". These are all things I experienced.

Another thing that occurred is Rankism: Which underlies all "isms". There is a ranking system or hierarchy. There are "Somebodies" and "Nobodies" and there is an abuse of power to secure their own position to the disadvantage of others "below" them in rank. These are all things that occurred.

As stated in the book Queer (In)Justice The criminalization of LGBT people in the United States by Mogul, Ritchie, and Whitlock Pg. 43 Queer Criminal Archetypes: "perverts lack the emotional stability of normal persons." "emotional unpredictability can escalate into full-blown, violent insanity" "A second unifying theme focuses on the danger, deception, and dishonesty allegedly embedded in sexual and gender nonconformity." " another theme asserts that LGBT people are perpetually engaged in nefarious efforts to lure innocent heterosexuals into same-gender sexual enthrallment" All of which were attributed to me in a meeting with the members of The Phoenix Cooperative and staff members of MCC.

"Group Think" is the underlying problem with cooperative living and my of my experience. http://www.psysr.org/about/pubs_resources/groupthink%20overview.htm

After having received two transphobic death threats via anonymous text message. I filed a police report with The City of Madison Police Department against The Phoenix Cooperative House and moved out.

I have since become a strong advocate AGAINST  "group think" and cooperative living.



 

FILLED WITH PRIDE!

Check this out! I'm quoted on their website. I completed my 45 hours of service learning experience with this organization for my Human Services Program. I couldn't be more proud of myself. http://www.porchlightinc.org/howToHelp_volunteer.html